Disclaimer: This post first appeared on Sincerely Shirley
So, lingerie is a love of mine and has been for a long time. And if you happened to read my post about making 2019 my best year yet, I briefly mentioned how I used to be 130 and have since gained a little bit of weight. And while this isn’t a post about weight gain or weight loss, I bring this up because even though I gained a little weight, I never let that stop me from wearing lingerie. But, sadly, too many women aren’t in the same boat as I am. They think that because they aren’t a size two that they can’t “look sexy” or wear lingerie. FaLsE!
And this makes my blood boil. Because guess what!?
sexy is a state of mind, not a look or a size. when you love yourself, you are sexy.
There. I said it. Please read that over and over and over.
When it comes to lingerie, there are so many other lies that women have been led to believe, which has unfortunately resulted in women spending way too much money (although do in fact I believe that some brands and some products are worth the investment), being uncomfortable just to accomplish a “look,” or not even wearing lingerie because they don’t think they meet the ridiculous standards that society has set. So please know that there are no rules for lingerie. Comfort is the only thing that matters. Honestly.
because when feel good, you look good.
So, with all of that being said, join me as I debunk the various lingerie myths out there, so that you can move forward feeling comfortable and knowing what is (and isn’t) true! 😘😘😘
Lingerie is not to be shown.
So false! Nowadays, with there are so many cute and unique pieces of lingerie available, women have decided that it’s just too cute to be concealed. In fact, it has become common for women to wear bodysuits under their skirts, shorts, or pants. In fact, some celebrities have opted out of even wearing panties on the red carpet. So, if they can do it, you can do it. And even if they didn’t do it, you can (and should, if you want to) do it, because you’re your own person and you are the only one who should decide what you do and do not wear! #facts
Lingerie has to be expensive.
Nope. In fact, spending more money on something does not always guarantee better quality. Now just to be clear, sometimes the statement, “quality over quantity” is true. I am a huge Lululemon addict and I firmly believe that when I go and spend $100+ on their leggings, that I am getting my full monies worth. But, when it comes to lingerie, it really is all about comfort. So, with that being said, if you find a bra for $20 that you like, think is cute, and it fits you — great! Price should never disqualify a piece of lingerie.
- romwe | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- prettylittlething | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- rosegal | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- boohoo | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- shein | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- fashion nova | view their lingerie + intimates selection
- forever 21 | view their lingerie + intimates selection
You must see a bra specialist to get properly measured.
No. First of all, I am the last person to turn anything down that could potentially result in me feeling most comfortable. But, let’s face it: we know our bodies best. And once again, comfort is the most important. And while I agree that it is important to know your bra size, it really is not crucial to go see a specialist.
Bras are always going to be uncomfortable, so just suffer through it.
This is like so far from the truth! Bras quite literally exist to give our breasts support. Your bra should feel very comfortable on you. Comfort, comfort, comfort! I cannot stress how important it is to make sure that your bra (and everything else that you wear) makes you feel comfortable.
Stay in your comfort zone when buying lingerie.
F!*% no! You will never grow as an individual if you always do what’s comfortable for you. This is true in all aspects of life, not just when it comes to buying and wearing lingerie. While you should be comfortable and do what’s best for you, you should also branch out and try things you never thought you’d be trying. Doing this will allow you to not only grow, but it will allow you the opportunity to see if you have other interests that you never thought you would have. If you’ve never liked lace, try a simple bra with a lace band. Something as small as this will allow you to explore who you are. You may be surprised by what you end up liking.
One bra is all you need.
No. I believe that a woman should, at the very least, have a regular padded bra (in nude, white, and black), a push-up bra, a sports bra, a strapless bra (in nude, white, and black), and a bralette. I know this sounds super extra and quite unnecessary, but hear me out! There are some outfits that you’ll wear when you want your breasts to show a little more. So, you will need a good push-up bra for this, because a normal padded bra does not offer the extra padding necessary for pushing the breasts up. And when you don’t feel like having padding, the bralette is the perfect little bra to wear. And while there are, in fact, some bralettes that have a small amount of padding, most come unpadded. And, of course, you will want to wear a well-fitting sports bra when doing any sort of physical activity!
Lingerie won’t look good on me; I don’t have the body for it.
Not true at all, I promise. With the availability of so many different types of lingerie, even if you don’t feel comfortable wearing a bodysuit or a corset, no biggie! Try out a babydoll. The fun part about lingerie is that you can have any body shape and find something that will flatter your body and make you feel comfortable and confident! This goes with the point I made in number 5: do not always just do what is most comfortable. Branch out. Do something new. Try wearing something you never thought you would ever wear.
White bras are to be worn under white shirts.
False. In fact, although it seems logical to wear a white bra under a white shirt so that the colors “blend” together to prevent the bra from showing, sadly that is not the case. When you wear a (usually bright) white bra under a white shirt, the colors contrast, therefore making the bra visible. Weird, right? I know. So, to fix this, you should invest in a nude-colored bra! Now, here’s where things get a little tricky for my women of color out there. While the industry has made adequate strides to be more inclusive of women of color, it’s not yet where it should be. Though I tend to wear a lot of darker colors, like black (my favorite!), grey, maroon, navy, and olive green, I do occasionally love to wear white tops. And when I do, my bra always shows through. Why? Because there are not a lot of brands out there that make nude colored bras for people with darker skin tones. Luckily I could really care less about what people think of me or my choice in clothing, so I wear what I wear and I rock it, regardless of what anybody else thinks!
But, allow me to get back on track, ha! To make up for me going off on a little tangent, I come bearing good news. If you just so happen to be a woman of color like me, then what I am about to tell you will hopefully be useful and beneficial to you!
Here are three high-quality brands that make bras for darker skin tones: (please keep in mind that these brands do not just cater to those with darker complexions!)
savage x fenty | click here to be taken directly to the bra page; you may have to scroll down the page a little to get to where the nude bras are, but once you see them, you won’t be disappointed!
nubian skin | click here to be taken to the “Nubian Skin Skin-tones” page where you can select which skin tone matches yours and then you can go from there!
target | click here to look around at Target’s selection of skin-toned undergarments. I will do a review soon! xo
Ladies, I hope this post cleared up any and all confusion for you! If you have any questions or comments, please always feel free to comment below or contact me here. And, as always, love to you all!